What is Facebook? Got an alternate definition?

[Clinton]

I don't know if you've seen my alternative webmaster glossary.

It has crap like

Content Website: A site put together by someone so full of himself that he believes what he has to say is more important than the ads.

and

Internet Archive: A graveyard and permanent repository for bad web design.

and

Netiquette: eating chocolates and she lost 10 lbs.

But I did it many moons ago and I'd like to update it. I want to add definitions for Twitter, Facebook, Wikipedia and other web phenomena from more recent years.

Any suggestions? I'll give you full credit for the contribution.

[grynge]

Facebook: A place to get poked by people unknown, A place to lose your job when the boss sees your stupid remarks, A place dumb arse criminals brag about their crimes and then wonder why the cops bust them.

[crabfoot]

Twitter~ something for twits, and twots (which for the uneducated is an old derogatory word meaning tadpoles, often confounded with another word meaning pudenda vulvalis).

Wikipedia - a place for pedants to place reliance on internet references.
Put the truth on there, and you cannot state "personal knowledge" as the basis of fact. Put the facts on a page of another site, then quote them, and you will find that your entry will survive as "needing further references" ad infinitum.

Nodad - a complete no-no, outré. Originating from the Sheffield area, explained and popularised by John Virgo through the phrase "No Dad, I'm not wearing that shirt", NODAD is a Northern English alternative to the Southern English PANTS, although it cannot have the extreme qualifier PINK, which is often used with PANTS. "Niet batchka" is a phonetic version of the expression in Russki - yes, it happens in other countries. Nonpapi in France (but not nonpapa, that's another place) ...

[DomainMagnate]

Facebook is the current biggest time waster on the Internet.

[Clinton]

DM, true, but I need to find another way of saying that.

In the meanwhile I added...
Wikipedia: The most authoritative definition site on the internet ... or it was till I edited the relevant section to say this page is the new authority.

[grynge]

Facebook: A place morons congregate to waste time and inform other morons the most trivial inane information about their boring lives just to try and make it sound like they lead exciting lives.

[Fiveleaves]

Please forgive me for jumping in, its months since I've been to this site (other life things) but this thread was impossible not to respond to:

Facebook: Where millions of people spend several hours a day sharing too much information about themselves with people who will use it to harm them.
Wikipedia: The truth according to those who shout the loudest.
Wikileaks: The truth according to those who most want to keep quiet about it.
Twitter: The noise made by small birds and other creatures with similar sized brains.
Social Media: Never having to meet anyone.
The Cloud: A way that you can pay for the privilege of having somebody else hold all your important information.

[Clinton]

I love it! I'll use some of those if I may

[Fiveleaves]

Of course. If you want more we can agree a rate ( of which having my account reinstated may be a part?)

[Clinton]

Your account has now been reinstated.

Wow, that was a cheap invoice!

Welcome back.